Hiding fandom in the underwear drawer since 1977

Dragons for xahra99 or xahra99

( personal reflection )
I have really, really want to develop more of the Temeraire cross-over. So, here's a little bit, picking up after the end of Unquenchable Fire.

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( Volkan won't take no for an answer  )

For adaese and wellinghall who asked why not Badgers in Narnian gardens?

ooOOoo

It had started quietly. But as the moon had risen, so had the voices, louder, more obnoxious, and drunker. And then they began singing that song. That disgusting, reprehensible song.

All night long.

Peter thrashed about in his bed and pulled the pillow over his head even more tightly.

It didn’t help. He could still hear the vile song.

Moose, Moose, I want a moose
I've never had anything quite like a moose
I'd trade Narnia’s sows for one lovely moose
When I'm in the mood for a very good lay
I go to the barn and get me some hay
I open the door and spread it around
'Cause Moose always 'come' when there's hay on the ground

That was the male chorus. Slurred, loud, raspy, and utterly foul. He buried himself into the feather bolster and hoped the females had lapsed in a drunken stupor from eating rotten cherries and would be unable to answer the males’ challenge.

Alas, no.

what's sauce for the gander is sauce for the goose.
Said I as I set out to find me a moose
A bear in the winter is furry and warm
And if you don't tickle, he'll do you no harm
In spring try an eagle, his feathers are light
That is if you are not afraid of great height

The female lyric was worse than the male – or maybe it was only that the sows’ voices were as drunken as the males' grunts, but higher pitched.

Woodchucks are all right, except that they bite
And foxes and rabbits won't last through the night
Cows would be fun, but they're hard to seduce
But you never need worry should you find a moose

That did it. The Badgers were as drunk as Skunks. He tossed covers and pillows to the floor, bolted out of bed, stomped to the door, and threw it open. It banged against the stone wall.

“Susan!” he bellowed in the direction of his sister’s bedchamber down the hall. “Susan!”

In summer, I fear you must make do with a boar
But, not to worry, soon fall comes once more
Then you can return to your own faithful moose
And so my dear sisters, I have to confess
Being loved by a moose, it is really the best

The door opened and his sister looked out into the hall at him. She looked suspiciously wide awake. If the lighting were better, Peter would probably notice the smug, victorious expression on her face.

“Fine!” Peter thundered. “I agree! You win! Give the Moles the terms they want! They can work the gardens alone. I do not care! So long as we do not endure this one night more! Do whatever it takes but GET THE BADGERS OUT OF THE ORCHARDS!!”


ooOOoo
And so we learn the reason why the Badgers don’t work in the Narnian gardens is because they sneak off into the orchards and get drunk on the fruit, like this badger did. The Moose Song, as always, is taken from Lord Gyric of Otershaghe's, Bawdy Song Book




ooOOoo

Doctor Dolly asks about Morgan meeting Bacchus for the first time.

-----
Morgan poked a finger straight into the god’s bare chest.

“You will bring back my son in one piece, sober, uninjured, disease-free, and with no hazy memories so shockingly embarrassing they will haunt him the rest of his life. And no wars! Or unplanned trips to distant lands where he wakes up chained to a wall.  Or in poison ivy!”

“And if I do not?” Bacchus taunted, his wine-stained lips pulled back in a mocking smile.

“You’ll live just long enough to regret it!”

“You threaten a god?”

“Yes,” Morgan replied. “Aslan owes me a lifetime of favours.  I'll call in the debt from him."  She poked the god again.

“Bring.”

Poke
“Back.”

Poke
“My son.”

Poke
“In one piece.”

Poke
“Or the Lion eats you."

For lady_songsmith who asked for this: Polly, Mary, South America, and the time all the books but one got soaked.

EDIT: NOW WITH ADDED COMMENTFIC (OF COURSE)


Three pairs of eyes peered over the edge of the dugout canoe into the murky depths of the Amazon.

Polly blew out an aggravated breath. “And I suppose that all your examination textbooks Digory gave you were in that bag now sinking to the bottom of the second largest river in the world?”

“I’m afraid so,” Mary replied airily. “The Latin and Greek, the religion, and the philosophy.”

“The only thing that did not fall in is Gadow’s Amphibia and Reptiles, Asim added.

“That is a stroke of luck, what?”

Polly vowed she was never traveling again with a seventeen year old girl. If she wanted further demonstration of the merits of relationships only with women, and rigorous use of contraception when with men, here it was in the boat next to her.

“What do you think, Asim?” Polly asked.

“I think I am more comfortable swimming with the fauna of Africa than South America.”

“Mary? What’s down there if I push you in to retrieve your bookbag?”

“Well, there is Eunectes murinus of course.”

Asim looked at Polly and she whispered, “Green Anaconda.”

“Largest snake in the world. There’s also Melanosuchus niger.”

“That’s a…”

“I know,” Asim said wearily. “It’s some kind of crocodile.”

“I wonder…” Mary leaned precariously over the side of the boat and stuck her fingers into a small school of circling fish. The fish rushed at her appetizing appendage.

“Ha! I thought so!” Mary exclaimed, yanking her fingers out. “Pygocentrus nattereri!!” She waggled her fingers – one was bleeding.

That did it.

“Asim, start the engine,” Polly said, utterly exasperated. Tempting as it was to shove Mary in, Polly really couldn’t blame her. The red piranhas of the Amazon were welcome to Digory’s fourth best copy of the Virgil’s Aeneid and Duns Scotus’ Questions on Metaphysics.

The following comment fics happened when I spammed the LJ of the lovely animus_wyrmis .  I realized after posting l_a_r_m  's birthday fic that I should probably move these all over here, in one place.  There are more over in Animus' LJ, but here is the gist of my own deplorable hijacking of the thread with discussion of the friends of the Friends of Narnia.  I discussed and linked it earlier, here, but it's all sort of hard to find and two people have asked for links, so here it is in one place.  The Lucy story is part of a much larger thread, with contributions by several amazing, talented women, including metonomia lady_songsmith  and animus_wyrmis. 

For those who saw these over in animus' LJ, there's no new content (other than what I did for LARM's birthday fic).

Susan, the Colonel and Tebbitt was posted here.


( Peter and the Tril )

********************************


( Polly and Richard on Valentine's Day )

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( Lucy was in a tree again )

*******

( Susan and Agnes have lunch )

Some rambling meta, over here rather than clogging up animus_wyrmis's LJ on Give the Pevensie A Friend.  Given the number of OCs who run around in my stories, the creating of friends (or even more of them) wasn't a problem.  It was shutting up about them. 

( Peter )
( Susan and Agnes )
( Lucy )
( Polly and Richard )( Susan, George, Moles, and Parts 3-4 )I felt badly I hijacked another person's thread, so thought it better to move it over here.

Ahhh, fanon.  It contributes so many things to our understanding of characters and worldbulding.  With Narnia fanon, we now believe that Edmund is not a morning person, that Peter has intense an emotional bond with his brother and a chip on his shoulder upon returning after LWW, and that leaving Caspian is the reason for Susan's apostasy.

Our collective contribution?  Edmund has a kink for women who are good at maths.  I have to say it was intrikate88  who noted that in light of my own worldbuilding Edmund would have probably had an interesting time in Spare Oom accounting classes.  The latest contribution is a commentfic started in metonomia 's LJ about Isamene, the fabulous squinty and freckled daughter of the Duke of Galma' in ilysia_039  's Singing Paeans to the Stars. 

"Why, I take a particular pride in my accounts, King Edmund."