"Oh, someone lost their shopping list," Richard said, stooping to pick up a scrap of paper covered in silver spiky cursive ink:

"To Buy
12 Eggs (chicken)
24 Eggs (rotten)
2 Eggs (Easter)
1 Loaf Bread (sourdough)
8 lb Strawberries (non-sentient)
1 Knife Set (kitchen)
3 Sets of Khakis (day-glo orange)
1 Top Hat (blue velvet)
16 Candles (pink)
1 Box of Chalk (pink)
1 Box of Chalk (blood-red, be sure to compare before purchasing)
1/2 Card Deck (dual playing & tarot)
1 Katana (water)

To Sell
6 Eggs (cockatrice)
5 Golden Rings (fingers not included)
3 Rumors of Royalty (2 true, 1 speculative)
1 Reverse Compass (never points N)
1 Katana (fire)
2 Doom Portents (gently used)

To Steal
1 Immortal Soul of Rock 'n Roll (furious)

"...is this something we should be concerned about?" Richard asked warily.

Door shrugged.